A trip to Norwich

This had nothing to do with writing - but it was to visit the University of East Anglia - so that my eldest son Ned could visit the Politics dept.  It is on a hill - so I was knackered before we even got half way there... however, I abandoned Ned to tour the buildings and went to the Sainsbury Centre - the art gallery.  It was boiling hot and didn't appear to have a cloak room so I spent the day lugging my velvet jacket around and feeling hot and exhausted.

What has this to do with writing?  Well, on the drive to Norwich I found myself thinking incessantly about the characters and so on - and found the conversation at dinner with my lovely friends a bit irrelevant because I was still thinking about TRF.   In the Sainsbury Centre (or whatever it's called) I sat down at a small table in front of a case of walrus and mammoth ivory items, figures mostly and found that I had no notebook with me - only a Filofax containing last year's calendar.  So I wrote on that.  I wrote for about 40 mins, then went to the cafe and wrote for another 45 mins.  Irritating to have to write longhand, so not much punctuation, unfinished words etc. but I was so pleased to have completed a good scene at the end of it.  It's the scene between the heroine and her husband when he tells her he wants a divorce... it seemed good: I'll be transcribing it today.

The upshot of this was that I didn't get my usual thrill at seeing a gallery - partly because of the nature of the collection, but also because I was so pre-occupied with the book.

Still going strong...

After a break I meant to get on top of things in the following week - but it just didn't work out.  I tell myself I will work from 9 to 1.00 and then try and do a little at the end of the afternoon.   But when I know something is going to happen I tend to slack off - I feel I can't write unless I know I will have a good load of time, because I hate having to stop for the clock - don't want to stop until I'm ready to.

This week is a useless week - I am going to Norwich tomorrow - to see friends and take Ned to the university... for a visit.  I am hoping to work a bit on Wednesday - I expect I will a bit.   However, in preparation for that I have written about 4,000 words (about half new, the rest re-cycled).  I hope I can manage a few more at the end of the week (Book Group, Pugin and other delights permitting).

"Author publishing"

Last night was our local Society of Authors meeting - we had two people, John Dawes and Richard Lloyd to talk about their experiences in what is being more politely called "author publishing" - self publishing seems to have connections with vanity publishing and I must admit, there is a sense of wondering whether a lot of self-published books are worthwhile.

Richard seems to have turned out a number of books that people have enjoyed.  He gives talks for money and then flogs the books... His is a very different model of generating sales and suits him.  I have to say I would not wish to go around talking about writing to WI's and other groups in the hope of generating sales - or rather, I wouldn't mind doing a bit of that, but I wouldn't want to do it more than once a month, as it would take a lot of time away from writing.

It's clearly a "horses for courses" matter - I think everyone was intrigued by the idea of getting out from under publishers - but at the same time, I think most of us felt that marketing was not our metier.

Richard has turned his back on the digital world - doesn't use the internet - and is clearly missing out on a great deal of potential income that way.  He also seems very pleased to have generated £5000 from one of his books - but most of us wouldn't regard that as exactly a best seller.   In lots of ways he represents a particular strand in author publishing - a rather parochial individual - likes to be in control of things etc. and this way of doing things is obviously designed for him.   Personally, I am still looking for the validation that comes from having a "proper publisher" and to not having to do much personal marketing....

Better...

I am going to paste this same entry on two blogs to save time. 

Well - due to two really full on days of writing, editing, cutting and pasting, recycling - I am now back approximately to where I was in the novel, before the Agent rang - I now have 52,000 words to get to this point - because I have excised a lot of stuff - a hell of a lot of stuff - including some rather good new stuff... This is a rough old business - I feel as if I've got 3 novels now - I am trying to think of ways to salvage some of the stuff that is currently in limbo - also I really do want to use some of the ideological stuff about university... I am now going to have 3 days off - which is great.  I hope that on Monday I will begin writing again bright and early and crack on with the long-anticipated sex scene....

Stuck!

OK - I am meant to be having a sabbatical from the blog while I re-write, re-shape, restructure the novel.   I started from scratch again yesterday afternoon and have written, edited and imported a total of 30,000 words.   And now I'm stuck.  I know what the Agent suggested, and I approve of it - but I'm not quite sure where to go next. 

I'm still a bit stuck about persons... I started with a bit of first, but I've veered back to 3rd... part of me thinks, if I just write, then I can edit at the end and it will all come right.... that's probably true... at the moment we're ending up with two parallel narratives - what's happening to Lucy in adult life from 2000 ish - with her reminiscences and writing about the past.... maybe this will provide a good structure... I just can't be sure.   I think the fact is that she will start in a loveless marriage - and end in a good relationship and will have decided not to settle for less than enough.... a personal romantic liberation...this makes a good story.   I can deal with the details later.

A short respite

The Agent has emailed me - she has told me some things not to do with TRF - unfortunately I had already done them.   I must now start again.  The re-cyling is driving me slightly nuts.... so I began again, and made a couple of interesting pages, before I introduced some old material.  I think I have a clearer idea of the story now - the emotional conflict, the changes, how the younger self would judge the older self... loss of idealism, clarity etc.   I need to write like the wind now - more so than ever, but I think this time I know more or less where it's going.  I am also much surer that this version won't be so flat.... getting away from a biographical narrative will be much better.   I am also going to revert to a mix of 1st and 3rd person - if she agrees that it's not too off-putting.

As a result, I am now going to go into purdah for a bit, try not to blog too much - or anything like that, just diet, stop drinking and work!

Collective endeavours

Once, when I was in my early 20s 3 of us discovered we were all "writing novels" - we agreed to meet and read and discuss our work.  Guess what, I was the only person who had work to read and hear critique of.  We were meant to meet again but we never did.    I can't even remember what I was writing that I read at the time.  It might have been an early bit of Berenice, which I was working on a bit then, and since the other 2 were classics grads as well it seemed appropriate.  

The reason I put "writing novels" in inverted commas was that in the last few years I've met several people who said they were "writing novels" - but after a bit of comradely discussion, turned out not to be.  Or to have had a good idea for one, or to have a killer first line/first paragraph, or something.   Most irritating was the woman who said to me (she had asked me what I did, and I said "I'm writing a novel") "Oh yes, a lot of people think they'd like to write a novel - I've often thought I should write one."   At that point I was on my 3-4th draft of The Formative Year.

Today - my birthday - my friend John sent me the most perfect birthday card - Rudyard Kipling's illustration of The Cat that Walked by Itself, a story that I've always associated myself with.   

Since that first attempt at starting a writer's group I've never wanted to go and do anything en masse with other struggling writers again.  Joining Authonomy was different, but in general I've felt that working and writing were the best way of improving one's work - and reading good writers.  Reading with a critical eye - and reading one's own work with a critical eye.  Recently people have begun to realise that I actually do write, not just witter on about it, and they have begun to ask me to come to groups and go to local seminars on How to Get Published - this is all very agreeable, but the sessions are often run by people whose work I don't really esteem... I can't help feeling this is a bit of a waste of time.

It is selfish I think - because I know if I went to a writers' group I would have to spend 90 mins or so listening to other people's work and trying to think of something constructive to say about it, and that's 90 minutes I could be profitably spending staring into space... of course one could learn stuff from other's experiences and mistakes, but - but -.  I found the Authonomy experience similar - I found it hard to like a lot of the work there, but one was meant to say something constructive.  Not that people minded if one simply said "I loved your book" and left it that.  But one had to give up a lot of time to read chunks of other people's novels, and if one was conscientious, to be constuctive.   And then there were the forums - clearly designed to keep writers busy for hours, and to prevent them sending in unwanted manuscripts...

Would I have written better if I'd done a post-grad writing course?  If only there'd been such things when I finished my degree... I think I would have written more sooner, with greater confidence.  Things would have been different, but no matter.  This is how it happened, it couldn't have happened any other way.  I would of course know all about stuff like story arcs, and I would probably be writing short stories all the time.  But let's face it Dickens, Stendahl, Joyce, Woolf etc. managed without the benefit of UEA or Exeter courses - they were rather closer to genius than me, but quand meme, would any of them have benefitted from a creative writing course?

Back at the coalface

After a couple of days doing other things - including editorial work on Claudius's Elephants (which is now reading really well and is stuffed with interesting anecdotes) - I have had another session on TRF - I managed 3,000 + words yesterday - partly re-cycled, partly new.  On page 129 now... over half way I think, although I suspect that this version is going to end up a bit longer than the original... am still feeling a bit sad about what's being discarded, but it is such a different book now. 

That's both a good thing and a bad thing.  I liked the old book - even though I think I knew in my heart of hearts that it wasn't quite strong enough to be a novel in its own right - and despite kind friends who "couldn't put it down".  I am sure the new version will be better and stronger - but I think my writing will be less alluring - it's a more "pragmatic" book than the old one - no more "velleities and carefully tuned regrets"... Heck I might stuff a few of those in anyway.

Claudius and the Elephants

Feeling pleased because I have finished doing that editing for M - at length - so can get on with TRF.  It is looking so much better now that he has incorporated some of the classical material in direct quotes so that the reader gets a feel for ancient attitudes and concerns.    He is sending it to Batsford - but it doesn't seem to fit with their current catalogue - I think he'd do better with one of the more "serious" history publishers, but I may be misjudging Batsford - they used to publish this sort of thing.

A growing pile of pages....

.,.. is what I'd have if I was typing this as a hard copy.   But TRF is growing by a judicious mix of re-ordering and re-writing and editing and long stints of new writing.  The original novel (final version) was about 98,000 words, and I've now got 58,000 words - so perhaps I can finish it by the end of February - barring accidents - then rest it for a fortnight and re-write during March when I've looked at it properly.

I really do have to stop writing now - and go and make supper, but I'd rather just stay here and write.... it's going well, everyone is behaving themselves beautifully - and I am especially happy since I decided I didn't have to give a blow by blow account of marriage and children - more detail than in the first version, but I can probably skip from 84 to 97ish without too much infill... of course we need to know about how her relationship with her husband deteriorates... and why she stays despite this, but I can cut out the Early Years/NCT experiences I think...although some sort of feminist thing on childcare would be useful.  (Hmm, that sounds boring....)

It continues...

After several days devoted to editing Mark's oeuvre, I managed to work for about 4-5 hours on TRF today.  I edited down a lot of the first section, getting it down from 130pp to 79 - and then began to write a new version of it.  Most of the next dozen chapters will be largely new material - but I have highlighted sections or phrases that I am going to lift....   I want Lucy to go and live either in a commune or a feminist flat share in short-life housing, but haven't quite decided which... they both have potential, maybe I'll combine them somehow... 3 months in the commune - deterred by winter in an unheated squat - takes up the offer of the feminist flat share?  She will not find it quite the nurturing environment she hopes for...